Get clear on what you are really frightened of.

Updated: Oct 29, 2020

This is an article I wrote this week for the subscribers the New Wings Success Community. I thought it could help a wider audience to know that even a Coach can feel panicked by the uncertainty of the future.


So I know we are supposed to be discussing Perfectionism but I know you probably don't give a rats arse right now if things are done perfectly or not.


I decided a better use for this week's spot was to share what happened to me on the weekend, what I did and what I took from the experience. I hope it will help you or someone you love.


Because right now we need to stick together.


I feel like we are being torn apart and everything we built as a community during the devastating Australian bushfires has been tossed aside. It feels like there are massive chasms opening up within the country and Australians are closing ranks to protect ourselves at an individual level.


There is so much information, and misinformation, about this COVID-19 virus and it changes hourly. It's hard to work out what's what and what we need to do.


So if you're feeling anxious or scared, that's completely OK.


I'm very lucky to live where I can get away from much of the hysteria. I can look out at the sheep and the trees and there's a beautiful sense of calm. I can breathe.....


......that is, as long as I don't turn on the radio, TV or look at Social media.


On Sunday, I emerged from my oasis of calm to do my weekly shop, as I always do, and with my list of all the normal things I needed for the next week I entered the Coles supermarket.


It only took a few minutes before the purple cloud of panic that was coming from my fellow shoppers washed over me. And that panic was screaming,


BUY IT NOW!! BUY IT ALL NOW!!

THE APOCALYPSE IS COMING!!


I was suddenly engulfed by a sense of HUGE urgency. My heart began racing and my brain couldn't focus on my shopping list. Instead, my brain kept repeating the same words over and over, "OMG, there's nothing left, what are you going to do, there's nothing left, what are we going to do?!".


I only needed one loaf of bread, I bought 3.

I had burgers planned for two people but I grabbed 2 of the one-kilo packs of mince. Most of the fresh vegies were gone so I scooted over to the frozen section and that was cleared out too.


WTF?!


A feeling of utter panic came over me. I had to get out! It wasn't til got into the car and breathed deeply that I asked myself a question that transformed the moment entirely,


"What am I really I frightened of?"


It's important to get really clear on what you are frightened of. Because when you recognise what it is you REALLY fear, you then have Choice. And to have Choice is something pretty special.


You have the choice to continue to act irrationally and make bad decisions. Or, you can choose to stop and think about your next move. You can then make good, well thought out, decisions about what you do next.


Acting like a madwoman, all hair on fire, with the adrenalin rushing through your veins is a recipe for chaos.

And this is exactly what we are seeing all over Australia right now.


What are YOU frightened of?


Maybe you're frightened of the impact on your job or the effect on the share market, maybe you’re scared of you or a family member getting sick, it will be different for everyone.


And whatever it is, that fear is real for you and that's OK. It’s OK to be frightened.


What is this fear giving you?

What do you get from living with this fear?

Is it good for your health? Is it helpful for you?

What is the quality of the decisions you're making?


And this is not forever.


I’m hearing from people who work directly with China that they are coming out the other side of the virus crisis now. Their hardline isolation policy seems to have worked for them.


This is a short term problem and whatever happens, you will get through this.

Emma Taberner is a qualified Life and Executive Coach, Speaker and Facilitator. With over 20 years Supply Chain industry experience and 10 years coaching and mentoring frontline leaders, she is passionate about helping people to understand their fears and to see fear as a natural step in creating success in business, relationships and in life. Emma works One to One, in groups and online with business owners and organisations to create empowered and engaged leaders and teams.

When she’s not building future leaders you can find her flying small planes, being in the outdoors, growing her own food and hanging out with her husband of over 20 years.

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